Writers' Block

The pen, slumber,
No wish to move,
Lazy, may be,
Bored, possibly.

Write, why should I,
Speak, feel not like,
Shy, not slightly,
Irritated, highly.

Words, stingy,
Tongue, twisted,
Mind, airy,
Appetite, lost.

Come, sit,
Wait and see,
Nothing at all,
Let it be.

I must be!

Not scared, not of the Reaper,
Au contraire, he feared he would never come,
Wished not to live, he had no want for a morrow,
For he was full of fear, his mind twisted, his heart random.

But it was his nature, call him uncertain,
He said, "No, I wish to go not."
Stood there, the Reaper,
"You dare say no, to me you do!
Know you not, who I be?
Lowly knave, know your place,
You will come with me."

"Aware I am, of who you are,
Indeed I have forever longed,
For an appointment with thee.
But you must understand,
There is still much I need to see,
Places I need to be,
Incomplete is my deed.
I care not, if you do not,
I am going to, for I must be!"

His Fiery Cage...

His head was in a whirlpool,
His body stood still,
She was all he ever wanted,
She was now his eternal crime.

He had wings once, his glory,
He could soar high, his might,
Lived strong he had, his pride,
Bright as the sun he shone, his form.

A guardian, a man of the league,
The one to show them the way to light,
Help deliver them from dark,
The leader, he was set to be.

A woman, looked at him,
And she looked at him again,
Her want, her passion, her lust,
Take him, she knew, she must.

On a night, pretty, starry,
She stood at the crossroads,
Sure as ever under the moon,
Ensure, even more, for him to see.

White she wore, held a red rose,
Eyes had tears, she saw him come,
Knelt in dispair, she was patient,
That he would stop, she was sure.

"Lady, why do you kneel,
Alone, in this night, beautiful.

Lost, are you,
Or do you wait, for someone,
Is there something you seek."

She looked up at him,
A pinning gaze,
Smile filled her face,
Moon, shone in her teary eyes.

"It is you I wait for,
I have been, for long.

Adulation, utmost,
Respect, supreme,
Love, not warranted.

Take me, take my heart,
Let yours be mine."

This was new, confusing,
Pleasureful, yet it was,
Adulation he had seen before,
But this, not like this.

He somehow pined for it,
A want filled him,
Yes, she was it,
He knew, he loved.

She took him in,
Care, love, she gave him,
Balming her words, kept him calm,
Her touch, made him live on.

"Love are they not heavy,
Your wings.

You carry them around all day,
Night even,
Why.

Give them to me,
I shall keep them safe,
Take them when you need."

He obliged, it felt good,
For once, someone understood,
Someone was willing to share the burden,
Or so he thought, till he came to see.

"Love, I miss it,
My freedom.

I miss soaring high,
The drops of rain,
Shattering on my face.

My duty calls,
I promise, I shall be back,
Let me fly"

"No, I know,
You wish to leave.

Had enough you have,
Of me, of this,
To run away you want.

A choice you must make,
Either your wings, or me,
You must take."

He stood there, sad,
His love, it seemed, had shackeld him,
But the lives of many was at stake,
He knew he had to leave.

Took his wings,
He looked at her,
Went to kiss her,
She looked away.

Broken, he spread his wings,
Long it had had been since he did,
Took flight, a tear, a sigh,
The job had to be done.

Overcome by grief she was,
Abandoned she felt, worthless,
To see him gone, she could not,
Unable to bear, her life she took.

His sorrow, unfathomable,
Damnation for her, not ever,
To hell, the dead he followed,
To salvage her soul he hoped.

Alas! Long gone,
The innards of hell had taken her,
Was left nothing to seek, in the space, dark, dank,
A space full of shrill shreaks.

"Destroy you,
I will.

You took her from me,
No, I will burn you,
Obliterate your existance."

Wave after fiery wave,
His rage reigned supreme,
Hell did burn, and burned a lot,
But it was him in hell's siege.

"Impressed I am,
Your tenacity is extreme.

Yet, you cannot leave,
This fire you have set, shall never perish,
Amends are in order, I believe.

You came, unwelcomed,
I cannot consume you.

But your strength is unparalleled,
I can use you.

Rule this chaos,
Help me build.

Take my throne,
Be my king."

Reluctant, he had no coice,
A seat of hate, he did not enjoy,
With all the might and his rage,
He set to rule, the fiery cage.

Roots

I visited this region after a long time, more than two years, and I said to myself, not much has changed here. The roads are still quite broken every time it rains, dogs still run rampant on roads and many a time die without anyone giving much of a bother, cattle still roam around where ever they feel like, they relieve themselves or take a seat when they deem fit , where they deem fit. People walk on roads and pavements are meant for hawkers to sell vegetables, fruits, cheap knock offs, rat poison, medicines that claim to cure impotency and paan (a peculiarly delicious edible made using betel leaves, betel nuts and many other things I cant really explain).

Do I have a problem with it, hell yeah I do. But there is flipside, and a rather big one at that. Life is simple, people are simple. Needs are few and people are generally happier.

It was after a long time I took a train. The route, Asansol, a town in West Bengal, to West Bengal's capital, Kolkata. The train station was filthy, the stench awful. But somehow, it was not entirely unacceptable. Do not get me wrong, it is not that I would not do something about it if I could, it is just that I do not dislike the place inspite of that.

The fact is that these are my roots and this is the person I am. I have grown out of this. Upon deeper consideration, roots have this nature. The more deep seated they are, the more unchanging they get. The fact that your roots are filthy and nothing much can be done to change them, signifies the fact that you are a part of something ancient. You are a part of a generation, one of many, that have derived their origin from the same roots.

So yeah, no matter how dirty, filthy and rigid it might be; this is where I come from and this is where I belong.

Journey

Travelling can be a very profound experience. I have heard many say that but this is probably the first time I am noticing it (or may be this is just the first time I have had the sense to record the thought).

Anyway, it has been brilliant. I guess after eight months of a state which might resemble your brain being hurled around in a centrifuge, I had eight hours completely to myself. No thoughts of bother to give me company. Just one, of a certain someone, very dear, very loved, taking up the entire space within my head. The sublime feeling of uninterrupted indulgence in thoughts of that one person.

Flying out of Australia is a pretty unique experience in itself. As you leave Melbourne, you leave behind a city with a beating heart. It is bright, vibrant, lively! But as you move up north, the population grows sparse and accordingly dwindles the density of lights you see down below. I do not know if I actually saw it or it was my sleep deprived brain playing tricks, but I at a point, just before leaving the land mass, did see a ring of fire. It was magnificent! Once that was gone, the flight just had the company of stars. The sky was clear and the view from the tiny window epic. It almost felt being in a time capsule. You know you are moving, you know the clock is ticking, but the object you are looking at just lies there, staring right back at you. The whole experience was enhanced by a drink of whiskey and the never ending loop of the thought of that certain someone.

I did watch a very crappy movie which could have destroyed the experience (Transcendence, don't ever watch it). But a couple of other movies saved th day (Million Dollar Arm and The Grand Budapest Hotel). Anyway, now I am sitting at the Kuala Lumpur International Airport waiting for my next flight and utilizing the time and technology to dish out this text.

Good stuff!

I have the right...if I can

It was a bright day,
A sunny day,
Thought to himself,
Come what may,
Think in a hopeful way.

He had reason,
He had scope,
Long it had been,
Since he had seen,
His peace not elope.

Time moved on,
Quick yet smoothe,
Confident he was,
He could now see,
Toil had lead to fruit.

Alas, this was not to be,
Not so soon at least,
Questions were raised,
Past caught up,
His thoughts in haze.

Why, why now, now again,
To himself he said,
It was perfect, immaculate,
Alas, wish it was easy,
Dejected, he surrendered.

His mind was puzzled,
His heart heavy,
Will almost broken,
Deep in his gut,
A voice spoke muffled.

Do not, he whispered again,
This is not the time,
Fight, push, get up,
Reach out unfazed,
Work it out, for me and mine.

I don't give a fuck!

I do not give a fuck a anymore,
Fuck this Shit!